We never stop learning

June 15, 2009

BY DAWN BAUMGARTNER VAUGHAN

dvaughan@heraldsun.com; 919-419-6563


I have a lot to learn. We all do. I've been writing about stuff in and around the Bull City for going on four years now. That comes out to hundreds of stories, and I've shaken hands, talked on the phone, and been to the homes and workplaces of way more people than that. You all have had much to teach.

So I'll share with you some of what I've learned about Durham. I'm not talking about Durham history -- that's too much information to fit in 16 inches of column space. I'm talking about what you have shown me with your words, your actions, your lives.

Durhamites are willing to get out of their comfort zone. That might mean volunteering beyond the typical church weekend activity. There are several hospitality houses around the city, where people who could live in a neighborhood like you'd find in Cary instead live in a diverse community whose commonality is poverty. And they like it there.

Some of you are passionate about justice. Some of you don't give a fig. Some of you are racist, and don't know it. Some of you are racist, and willing to share that with everybody.

Some of you respect the police and feel protected. Some of you are afraid and distrustful of the police. Some have good reasons to feel that way, some don't.

I've met some Durhamites -- and an Orange County resident -- who died since the stories featuring them were published. I learned lessons from how they lived their lives.

Like Sandra B. Sooey of Hurdle Mills, who rediscovered her inner child late in life and with it found the key to happiness, a happiness she wanted to share with others.

Like 100 year-old Rev. V.E. Brown, who served as pastor of Gethsemane Missionary Baptist Church on Roxboro Street for 46 years.

I interviewed him the very day his wife died. With his children and others surrounding him, he told me how he felt the call to preach as a child. How he worked multiple jobs throughout his life and persevered, living a life on the straight and narrow. "Live right," he told me. "Hard work will hurt nobody." He died not long after.

In September 2007, I interviewed Vijay Joshi, a retired math and physics professor who taught me that a love of vocation is to be shared. And that thanking a mentor doesn't stop when the formal instruction stops. Joshi's gift to his professor and lifelong friend on his 100th birthday were 3-D geometric models Joshi and his wife built with colorful plastic parts. Joshi was excited as he talked about how they were made. He died a few months later, but I remember his energy and zest.

And of course there was David Turner, whom I wrote about several times this spring as he faced down lymphoma and eventually died from it June 6, just a few weeks shy of his 26th birthday. Turner taught me that you can accept bad news with dignity. That you can make peace with life and death. That you can fight the good fight but know when to accept reality. That what you leave behind is as important as what you accomplish when you're here. That connecting with people and showing your humanity is the honest way to live.

Education is lifelong. It doesn't just come from inside fancy stone and brick buildings where the smart, well-funded and successful have the opportunity to learn from the masters. While formal education is vital, it is not the whole picture.

Life experience counts too. Both your own and learning about what others' experiences have to teach us. I'm always learning on the job. If there's something about your life -- or someone else's -- that you think can be a lesson to someone else, let me know.

© Copyright 2009 by The Durham Herald Company